Extrovert with a Purpose

Man, I can work a room, and I cannot even begin to pretend to count the number of events, parties, and services that I’ve run. In each case, I can glide through the room talking to everyone. Any age, any background, I don’t care – I love it all. But again and again, I find myself in the post hangout glow, also known as cleanup, wondering if I made any real connection. Did I actually accomplish what I had set out to do? The questions always mount. This is a real pitfall for extroverts.

In our love and our need to connect here, there, and everywhere, is the real need to make meaningful connections. As we grow in making connections our gauge should be whether we have learned anything new about the people that we spoke with and whether our overall relationship is growing closer or if it is stagnant, if at all truly present.

PLUSONE is definitely about real, personal, and present connections. Our desire is for you to actually be a part of peoples lives.

If you were to suddenly no longer be part of someone’s life would they notice? Would they care? Would they be missing something and feeling a sense of loss in an area of their lives?

Something Deeper

Our culture is amazing at superficial relationships and we are constantly refining the process of being around others without being present and engaging. I mean, could you imagine if someone phoned you. The digital reproduction of their voice from miles away would be an intrusion to most people.

In an age of non-social social interactions, where an individual has to correctly project their self through images, incessant commentary, memes and sharing other people’s crap, we are literally trying to be ‘Liked’. While the sentiment is not new the mediums have changed leading me to ask, how Earth-shattering would it be if Christians loved others when being liked wasn’t merited? What would be the impact of a simple hug be to someone that is not a part our inner circle, but who is still of all eternal value as a child of God, no matter how close or how far from Him?

What have been the most powerful relationships in your life? Were they the result of meaningful connection? Were they the result of momentary pleasantries?

Give it a Year

One of the quickest ways to make sure that life is predictable and comfortable is to make sure that everyone that you associate with looks like you, talks like you, thinks like you, shares your tastes, oh – and you need to have similar incomes.

At the outset of a new relationship, we have zero ideas about what will come to pass. Calm down. Relax, and enjoy the ride. Nothing happens overnight, and while this is often a source of frustration I hope that you will find it to be an encouragement. No kidding you didn’t change someone’s life by just being around them for a week or they don’t seem to have turned out to be your new bestie in a day or two.

Be eager to enter into relationships that don’t have to take a specific shape and allow yourself to be present for an extended season.

It is most likely that you aren’t going to talk to everyone every week. People have their own schedules and priorities, and that’s OK. Take the next year in stride and it will prove to be eye-opening and begin to show you what God had intended all along.

There have been several occasions this past year where my wife and I would be inviting people over or out to something and we were met with an honest “We are so sorry that we can’t make it.” Our reply – “Don’t worry about it, we aren’t going anywhere!” Good things take work and great things take time.


  • Sorry, it’s a big one. Since a ‘Natural World View’ states that everything is and will be the result chance, time and matter, how have you arrived to hold value statements, particularly the value of people?


  • What on Earth are you trying to accomplish when you hang out with new people?
  • Are any of those things possible without God’s Spirit being at work?
  • If not, how does this affect your outlook on these interactions?

Ryan Rainville

1 thought on “Extrovert”

  1. And ask yourself, what are my expectations? . Be present and have a open heart. Connection is simple and powerful. Invite Holy Spirit to do what he does.

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